"Just get in the car, Alice. I’ll explain on the way."
my father told me once to never date anyone who talks smoothly around you from the start because if someone likes you they should be a little nervous and honestly i think that’s some of the best advice anyone has ever given me
The hardcore way to eat ramen:
1. Boil water
2. Eat block of ramen
3. Drink boiled water
4. Snort flavored powder
5. Fuck bitches
you looking for this my friend?
why is there a gif for this
bury me in armor so I’ll be ready for the skeleton war
why is his fricking chest uncovered? that’s ppor planning right there
what are you gonna do?
stab a skeleton in the heart?
no, I’ll play their rib bones like xylobones and destroy the morale of the skeleton army with my sick and delightful xylobone playing
*me in my grave laughing cause nobody knows the r.i.p. on my tombstone stands for rugrats in paris*
Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
How many Hogwarts boys do you think Madam Pomfrey has to fix every year because they messed up trying to cast an Engorgio on their dicks
asking the real questions
Homosexuality is unnatural! It says so in this book where snakes talk, people come back from the dead, a guy walks on water, and a virgin has a baby.
Can I just. Ignorant people use the bible as a defense against homosexuality because theyre uncomfortable with it and…
MY FAVOURITE PICTURE OF THE QUEEN
EVERYBODY ELSE IS LIKE SHOCKED AND MORTIFIED AND SHE’S JUST LIKE “BUT THE PARTY HAS ONLY JUST STARTED MOTHERFUCKERS”
instead of desexualizing womens halloween costumes we should sexualize mens costumes and make it equal. i want boys in underwear and cat ears
I like your style, kid.
ME VS THE REAL WORLD